PHILADELPHIA – The cheesesteak who was forced into a nonconsensual photo-op aboard Air Force One last week has announced that he is in self-quarantine after…
The Philadelphia Satirer
CHALFONT, PA- Providing new conclusions on a growing field of research, a new report issued by your mom last night at the dinner table disclosed…
As the worst recession since the great elf-strike of ‘64 ravages the Land Of Make Believe, the Tooth Fairy told citizens in a statement last Tuesday that she will begin collecting fingernails in addition to teeth to soften the effects of the crash.
TOLEDO, OH – The marquee panel discussion at this year’s Association of Romantic Novelists and Romance Enthusiasts Convention surprised attendees with the results of a…
NEW YORK CITY – Nineteen years after the tragic attacks of September 11th, 2001 killed nearly 3,000 people, heroic businesses across the United States are…
A new report from the city of brotherly love details that Eagles PPE masks used to protect you from COVID-19 will not in fact protect you from a punch thrown by a Dallas Cowboys fan.
DARBY, PA – Shouting “I wanna see your hands” into his iPhone 6s, local disc jockey Jeremy McMullen reportedly created an authentic DJ experience on…
CAMBRIDGE, MA – “Oh fuck, what did I get into last night?” stammered freshman Brayden Colby Lunsford as he woke up next to an unexpected…