Mattress without a bed frame
Disappointing spice rack
Swiffer WetJet
Scrapple
The classic “8-Pairs-Of-Shoes-Taped-To-Shirt-And-Pants” monster
Shower mildew
Cat vomit, I think
Take all of your small houseplants out of their pots. Put the roots and soil into your pockets. I’m not sure if this is a costume- I just wanted to see what it looked like.
A copy of The Secret by Rhonda Byrne my coworker let me borrow
Divorce papers
For when all of us write something or we’re too cowardly to put a name on an article. Hey, we’d like to be employed by whatever soulless corporation did a Google search to make sure we’re not a moron! Now you won’t know which one of us is the moron and you have to hire whoever applied!