BROOKLYN – Putting in place the lessons from a recent BDSM class, Patricia Reed surprised boyfriend Bruce Gibbs by entering his bedroom with an unexpectedly girthy strap-on dildo. “Oh, you wanted to try this tonight?” Gibbs inquired. “I mean, I’m excited too, I just didn’t think we’d add in the extra stuff so soon.” As Reed tightened the straps, Gibbs muttered, “It just didn’t look that big online…” When reached for comment, Gibbs stammered, “Oh wow…oh geez, man that’s… Oh, wow. Just wow. Wooof. Well…wow. Oh wow. Geez, I just…wow. Wow oh wow. Well I don’t…but well we–I just. Wow. What? They make them THAT…wow. Oh wow.”
EDITOR’S NOTE: Gibbs has amended his final comment to read “OH! WOW!” We apologize for any confusion.
For when all of us write something or we’re too cowardly to put a name on an article. Hey, we’d like to be employed by whatever soulless corporation did a Google search to make sure we’re not a moron! Now you won’t know which one of us is the moron and you have to hire whoever applied!
