- Stinky Tofurkey
It’s always the worst person at the table sending special requests to the kitchen, and this time it’s your aunt’s new mid-life crisis vegan boyfriend.
- Rotten Deviled Eggs
God be the glory! These adorable little eggs reek of the devil’s drip — one bite will have you running towards confession (and the bathroom) with your 13-year-old cousin who just found out what porn is.
- Grandma’s 1950s Jello Salad
Famous during the Great Depression for making everyone greatly depressed. This year’s version features a stapler inside the gelatin mold, all thanks to granny’s recent dementia diagnosis and her newfound obsession with The Office.
- Canned Cranberry Sauce
Are you kidding me?!?!?! This made it to the list?? It’s literally not even a recipe, it’s just mush in a jar. Either way, you can be sure your broke uncle will walk through the door with this shit.
- Creamed Spinach
Ok, ok, ok, creamed spinach is normally pretty good, but this side dish was made specially by your woke mom who just joined the Goop community — who knows what kind of cream is in that spinach.