{"id":832,"date":"2021-02-12T08:00:00","date_gmt":"2021-02-12T13:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/philadelphiasatirer.com\/?p=832"},"modified":"2021-02-04T21:54:17","modified_gmt":"2021-02-05T02:54:17","slug":"5-over-the-top-valentines-day-gifts-that-say-i-dont-know-you-at-all","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/thephiladelphiasatirer.com\/2021\/02\/12\/5-over-the-top-valentines-day-gifts-that-say-i-dont-know-you-at-all\/","title":{"rendered":"5 Over The Top Valentine\u2019s Day Gifts That Say \u201cI Don\u2019t Know You At All\u201d"},"content":{"rendered":"\n
\"\"
Photo by Anna Tarazevich from Pexels<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n\n\n\n

So, you\u2019ve been dating him for a few weeks and that big day is so soon– and you have no clue what to give him or even if he has siblings! Listening isn\u2019t exactly your strong suit.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Valentine\u2019s Day is a special day to celebrate your feelings for him and show him you care, but what if you barely know anything about him? Don\u2019t worry, below we have a great gift guide for that man you really know nothing about, but can\u2019t wait to spend V-day with!<\/p>\n\n\n\n

An Extremely Large Gift Card to Staples<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Everyone loves paper supplies and now your man can get whatever he wants for 500 dollars or less! You know he, um, goes to work somewhere, so you assume he needs some office supplies for that. A practical gift that will show you care about his career and have lots of extra trust fund money to burn.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

A Truck<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

He doesn\u2019t exactly drive, but that doesn\u2019t mean he won\u2019t learn. Plus, you think it’s hot when a man drives! Hopefully if he learns how to drive the truck, he’ll start going shirtless, wearing cutoffs, and looking like a hunky farmer from a Danielle Steele novel and you\u2019ll finally be attracted to him. Also you have so much money so it\u2019ll barely make a dent in your bank account.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

A Swing Band that Plays for him at his Place of Work<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

You\u2019re not exactly sure where that is\u2026but the whole band can just, like, follow him there and then serenade him for the day. You\u2019re also not really sure if he actually likes swing, but it\u2019s so upbeat and generic, who wouldn\u2019t enjoy a little accompaniment!<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Socks Made out of Gold<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Getting socks for your man is so lame! But if they\u2019re gold, that\u2019s super stylish and in vogue! He\u2019ll have a hard time wearing sneakers on top of them and he could get some foot rashes, but it\u2019ll be so worth it because his trendsetting will be through the roof and all your rich friends will be so impressed.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

A Coal Burning Pizza Oven<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

He likes pizza, right?? Most guys do\u2026 This coal burning pizza oven is imported from Italy and can be easily inserted into the wall of his Brooklyn rental studio for an authentic pizza making experience. Who wants to Seamless when you can make your own pizza with lots of real live burning coals and manly fire that hopefully will not at all upset his landlord?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Valentine\u2019s Day gifts can be nerve-wracking, but as long as you throw some money down, he\u2019s sure to love it! Just remember, the bigger and more generic, the better!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

So, you\u2019ve been dating him for a few weeks and that big day is so soon– and you have no clue what to give him…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":18,"featured_media":834,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[22,136],"tags":[235,234,233],"yoast_head":"\n5 Over The Top Valentine\u2019s Day Gifts That Say \u201cI Don\u2019t Know You At All\u201d - The Philadelphia Satirer<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/thephiladelphiasatirer.com\/2021\/02\/12\/5-over-the-top-valentines-day-gifts-that-say-i-dont-know-you-at-all\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"5 Over The Top Valentine\u2019s Day Gifts That Say \u201cI Don\u2019t Know You At All\u201d - The Philadelphia Satirer\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"So, you\u2019ve been dating him for a few weeks and that big day is so soon– and you have no clue what to give him…\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/thephiladelphiasatirer.com\/2021\/02\/12\/5-over-the-top-valentines-day-gifts-that-say-i-dont-know-you-at-all\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"The Philadelphia Satirer\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:publisher\" content=\"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/philadelphiasatirer\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2021-02-12T13:00:00+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:modified_time\" content=\"2021-02-05T02:54:17+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:image\" content=\"https:\/\/thephiladelphiasatirer.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/02\/pexels-anna-tarazevich-5740537-edited.jpg\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:width\" content=\"1920\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:height\" content=\"1081\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:type\" content=\"image\/jpeg\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"Catherine Weingarten\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:creator\" content=\"@philasatirer\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:site\" content=\"@philasatirer\" \/>\n<script type=\"application\/ld+json\" class=\"yoast-schema-graph\">{\"@context\":\"https:\/\/schema.org\",\"@graph\":[{\"@type\":\"Article\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/thephiladelphiasatirer.com\/2021\/02\/12\/5-over-the-top-valentines-day-gifts-that-say-i-dont-know-you-at-all\/#article\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/thephiladelphiasatirer.com\/2021\/02\/12\/5-over-the-top-valentines-day-gifts-that-say-i-dont-know-you-at-all\/\"},\"author\":{\"name\":\"Catherine Weingarten\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/thephiladelphiasatirer.com\/#\/schema\/person\/1fc0e12a8224efb8b5736518edfcbde3\"},\"headline\":\"5 Over The Top Valentine\u2019s Day Gifts That Say \u201cI Don\u2019t Know You At All\u201d\",\"datePublished\":\"2021-02-12T13:00:00+00:00\",\"dateModified\":\"2021-02-05T02:54:17+00:00\",\"mainEntityOfPage\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/thephiladelphiasatirer.com\/2021\/02\/12\/5-over-the-top-valentines-day-gifts-that-say-i-dont-know-you-at-all\/\"},\"wordCount\":486,\"publisher\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/thephiladelphiasatirer.com\/#organization\"},\"keywords\":[\"dating\",\"gifts\",\"Valentine's day\"],\"articleSection\":[\"Relationships\",\"Seasonal\"],\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\"},{\"@type\":\"WebPage\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/thephiladelphiasatirer.com\/2021\/02\/12\/5-over-the-top-valentines-day-gifts-that-say-i-dont-know-you-at-all\/\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/thephiladelphiasatirer.com\/2021\/02\/12\/5-over-the-top-valentines-day-gifts-that-say-i-dont-know-you-at-all\/\",\"name\":\"5 Over The Top Valentine\u2019s Day Gifts That Say \u201cI Don\u2019t Know You At All\u201d - The Philadelphia Satirer\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/thephiladelphiasatirer.com\/#website\"},\"datePublished\":\"2021-02-12T13:00:00+00:00\",\"dateModified\":\"2021-02-05T02:54:17+00:00\",\"breadcrumb\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/thephiladelphiasatirer.com\/2021\/02\/12\/5-over-the-top-valentines-day-gifts-that-say-i-dont-know-you-at-all\/#breadcrumb\"},\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"ReadAction\",\"target\":[\"https:\/\/thephiladelphiasatirer.com\/2021\/02\/12\/5-over-the-top-valentines-day-gifts-that-say-i-dont-know-you-at-all\/\"]}]},{\"@type\":\"BreadcrumbList\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/thephiladelphiasatirer.com\/2021\/02\/12\/5-over-the-top-valentines-day-gifts-that-say-i-dont-know-you-at-all\/#breadcrumb\",\"itemListElement\":[{\"@type\":\"ListItem\",\"position\":1,\"name\":\"Home\",\"item\":\"https:\/\/thephiladelphiasatirer.com\/\"},{\"@type\":\"ListItem\",\"position\":2,\"name\":\"5 Over The Top Valentine\u2019s Day Gifts That Say \u201cI Don\u2019t Know You At All\u201d\"}]},{\"@type\":\"WebSite\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/thephiladelphiasatirer.com\/#website\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/thephiladelphiasatirer.com\/\",\"name\":\"Philadelphia Satirer\",\"description\":\"Committed to dispensable journalism\",\"publisher\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/thephiladelphiasatirer.com\/#organization\"},\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"SearchAction\",\"target\":{\"@type\":\"EntryPoint\",\"urlTemplate\":\"https:\/\/thephiladelphiasatirer.com\/?s={search_term_string}\"},\"query-input\":\"required name=search_term_string\"}],\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\"},{\"@type\":\"Organization\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/thephiladelphiasatirer.com\/#organization\",\"name\":\"Philadelphia Satirer\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/thephiladelphiasatirer.com\/\",\"logo\":{\"@type\":\"ImageObject\",\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/thephiladelphiasatirer.com\/#\/schema\/logo\/image\/\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/philadelphiasatirer.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/04\/image.png\",\"contentUrl\":\"https:\/\/philadelphiasatirer.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/04\/image.png\",\"width\":1056,\"height\":138,\"caption\":\"Philadelphia Satirer\"},\"image\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/thephiladelphiasatirer.com\/#\/schema\/logo\/image\/\"},\"sameAs\":[\"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/philadelphiasatirer\/\",\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/philasatirer\",\"https:\/\/www.instagram.com\/philadelphiasatirer\/\"]},{\"@type\":\"Person\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/thephiladelphiasatirer.com\/#\/schema\/person\/1fc0e12a8224efb8b5736518edfcbde3\",\"name\":\"Catherine Weingarten\",\"image\":{\"@type\":\"ImageObject\",\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/thephiladelphiasatirer.com\/#\/schema\/person\/image\/\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/977bdb0635a86e28b75ea09b59d10693?s=96&d=mm&r=g\",\"contentUrl\":\"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/977bdb0635a86e28b75ea09b59d10693?s=96&d=mm&r=g\",\"caption\":\"Catherine Weingarten\"},\"url\":\"https:\/\/thephiladelphiasatirer.com\/author\/catherineweingarten\/\"}]}<\/script>\n<!-- \/ Yoast SEO plugin. -->","yoast_head_json":{"title":"5 Over The Top Valentine\u2019s Day Gifts That Say \u201cI Don\u2019t Know You At All\u201d - The Philadelphia Satirer","robots":{"index":"index","follow":"follow","max-snippet":"max-snippet:-1","max-image-preview":"max-image-preview:large","max-video-preview":"max-video-preview:-1"},"canonical":"https:\/\/thephiladelphiasatirer.com\/2021\/02\/12\/5-over-the-top-valentines-day-gifts-that-say-i-dont-know-you-at-all\/","og_locale":"en_US","og_type":"article","og_title":"5 Over The Top Valentine\u2019s Day Gifts That Say \u201cI Don\u2019t Know You At All\u201d - The Philadelphia Satirer","og_description":"So, you\u2019ve been dating him for a few weeks and that big day is so soon– and you have no clue what to give him…","og_url":"https:\/\/thephiladelphiasatirer.com\/2021\/02\/12\/5-over-the-top-valentines-day-gifts-that-say-i-dont-know-you-at-all\/","og_site_name":"The Philadelphia Satirer","article_publisher":"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/philadelphiasatirer\/","article_published_time":"2021-02-12T13:00:00+00:00","article_modified_time":"2021-02-05T02:54:17+00:00","og_image":[{"width":1920,"height":1081,"url":"https:\/\/thephiladelphiasatirer.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/02\/pexels-anna-tarazevich-5740537-edited.jpg","type":"image\/jpeg"}],"author":"Catherine Weingarten","twitter_card":"summary_large_image","twitter_creator":"@philasatirer","twitter_site":"@philasatirer","schema":{"@context":"https:\/\/schema.org","@graph":[{"@type":"Article","@id":"https:\/\/thephiladelphiasatirer.com\/2021\/02\/12\/5-over-the-top-valentines-day-gifts-that-say-i-dont-know-you-at-all\/#article","isPartOf":{"@id":"https:\/\/thephiladelphiasatirer.com\/2021\/02\/12\/5-over-the-top-valentines-day-gifts-that-say-i-dont-know-you-at-all\/"},"author":{"name":"Catherine Weingarten","@id":"https:\/\/thephiladelphiasatirer.com\/#\/schema\/person\/1fc0e12a8224efb8b5736518edfcbde3"},"headline":"5 Over The Top Valentine\u2019s Day Gifts That Say \u201cI Don\u2019t Know You At All\u201d","datePublished":"2021-02-12T13:00:00+00:00","dateModified":"2021-02-05T02:54:17+00:00","mainEntityOfPage":{"@id":"https:\/\/thephiladelphiasatirer.com\/2021\/02\/12\/5-over-the-top-valentines-day-gifts-that-say-i-dont-know-you-at-all\/"},"wordCount":486,"publisher":{"@id":"https:\/\/thephiladelphiasatirer.com\/#organization"},"keywords":["dating","gifts","Valentine's day"],"articleSection":["Relationships","Seasonal"],"inLanguage":"en-US"},{"@type":"WebPage","@id":"https:\/\/thephiladelphiasatirer.com\/2021\/02\/12\/5-over-the-top-valentines-day-gifts-that-say-i-dont-know-you-at-all\/","url":"https:\/\/thephiladelphiasatirer.com\/2021\/02\/12\/5-over-the-top-valentines-day-gifts-that-say-i-dont-know-you-at-all\/","name":"5 Over The Top Valentine\u2019s Day Gifts That Say \u201cI Don\u2019t Know You At All\u201d - The Philadelphia Satirer","isPartOf":{"@id":"https:\/\/thephiladelphiasatirer.com\/#website"},"datePublished":"2021-02-12T13:00:00+00:00","dateModified":"2021-02-05T02:54:17+00:00","breadcrumb":{"@id":"https:\/\/thephiladelphiasatirer.com\/2021\/02\/12\/5-over-the-top-valentines-day-gifts-that-say-i-dont-know-you-at-all\/#breadcrumb"},"inLanguage":"en-US","potentialAction":[{"@type":"ReadAction","target":["https:\/\/thephiladelphiasatirer.com\/2021\/02\/12\/5-over-the-top-valentines-day-gifts-that-say-i-dont-know-you-at-all\/"]}]},{"@type":"BreadcrumbList","@id":"https:\/\/thephiladelphiasatirer.com\/2021\/02\/12\/5-over-the-top-valentines-day-gifts-that-say-i-dont-know-you-at-all\/#breadcrumb","itemListElement":[{"@type":"ListItem","position":1,"name":"Home","item":"https:\/\/thephiladelphiasatirer.com\/"},{"@type":"ListItem","position":2,"name":"5 Over The Top Valentine\u2019s Day Gifts That Say \u201cI Don\u2019t Know You At All\u201d"}]},{"@type":"WebSite","@id":"https:\/\/thephiladelphiasatirer.com\/#website","url":"https:\/\/thephiladelphiasatirer.com\/","name":"Philadelphia Satirer","description":"Committed to dispensable journalism","publisher":{"@id":"https:\/\/thephiladelphiasatirer.com\/#organization"},"potentialAction":[{"@type":"SearchAction","target":{"@type":"EntryPoint","urlTemplate":"https:\/\/thephiladelphiasatirer.com\/?s={search_term_string}"},"query-input":"required name=search_term_string"}],"inLanguage":"en-US"},{"@type":"Organization","@id":"https:\/\/thephiladelphiasatirer.com\/#organization","name":"Philadelphia Satirer","url":"https:\/\/thephiladelphiasatirer.com\/","logo":{"@type":"ImageObject","inLanguage":"en-US","@id":"https:\/\/thephiladelphiasatirer.com\/#\/schema\/logo\/image\/","url":"https:\/\/philadelphiasatirer.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/04\/image.png","contentUrl":"https:\/\/philadelphiasatirer.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/04\/image.png","width":1056,"height":138,"caption":"Philadelphia Satirer"},"image":{"@id":"https:\/\/thephiladelphiasatirer.com\/#\/schema\/logo\/image\/"},"sameAs":["https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/philadelphiasatirer\/","https:\/\/twitter.com\/philasatirer","https:\/\/www.instagram.com\/philadelphiasatirer\/"]},{"@type":"Person","@id":"https:\/\/thephiladelphiasatirer.com\/#\/schema\/person\/1fc0e12a8224efb8b5736518edfcbde3","name":"Catherine Weingarten","image":{"@type":"ImageObject","inLanguage":"en-US","@id":"https:\/\/thephiladelphiasatirer.com\/#\/schema\/person\/image\/","url":"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/977bdb0635a86e28b75ea09b59d10693?s=96&d=mm&r=g","contentUrl":"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/977bdb0635a86e28b75ea09b59d10693?s=96&d=mm&r=g","caption":"Catherine Weingarten"},"url":"https:\/\/thephiladelphiasatirer.com\/author\/catherineweingarten\/"}]}},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/thephiladelphiasatirer.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/832"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/thephiladelphiasatirer.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/thephiladelphiasatirer.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thephiladelphiasatirer.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/18"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thephiladelphiasatirer.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=832"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/thephiladelphiasatirer.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/832\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":836,"href":"https:\/\/thephiladelphiasatirer.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/832\/revisions\/836"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thephiladelphiasatirer.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/834"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/thephiladelphiasatirer.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=832"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thephiladelphiasatirer.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=832"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thephiladelphiasatirer.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=832"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}