{"id":690,"date":"2020-12-27T20:34:06","date_gmt":"2020-12-28T01:34:06","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/philadelphiasatirer.com\/?p=690"},"modified":"2020-12-27T20:34:08","modified_gmt":"2020-12-28T01:34:08","slug":"cat-judging-you-on-how-little-time-you-spend-cleaning-privates","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/thephiladelphiasatirer.com\/2020\/12\/27\/cat-judging-you-on-how-little-time-you-spend-cleaning-privates\/","title":{"rendered":"Cat Judging You On How Little Time You Spend Cleaning Privates"},"content":{"rendered":"\n
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Photo by Erik-Jan Leusink<\/a> on Unsplash<\/a><\/span><\/figcaption><\/figure><\/div>\n\n\n\n

PHILADELPHIA– The majority of humans often wonder what their pets are thinking, but with a breakthrough technology developed at the University of Pennsylvania we don\u2019t have to wonder anymore. \u201cThe technology involves a small magical top hat for the pet to wear which is connected to a computer,\u201d detailed researcher Herman Munger. After the test subject, a cat named Marcel, was trained to not hate wearing the hat, he wore it as he went about his daily activities. \u201cThe majority of Marcel\u2019s thoughts involved wondering why his owners couldn\u2019t see the interdimensional beings passing through their home and keeping his privates clean for inspection by said interdimensional beings. He also expressed deep disgust at the lack of time his owners spent cleaning their own privates. Marcel believes he used to see his owners clean each-other’s privates, but he hasn\u2019t seen that in a while,\u201d remarked Munger. At press time, Marcel was feeling rather proud about how clean he had gotten his backside and wanted everyone to take a look.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

PHILADELPHIA– The majority of humans often wonder what their pets are thinking, but with a breakthrough technology developed at the University of Pennsylvania we don\u2019t…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":4,"featured_media":691,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[28,10],"tags":[190,191,193,192],"yoast_head":"\nCat Judging You On How Little Time You Spend Cleaning Privates - The Philadelphia Satirer<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/thephiladelphiasatirer.com\/2020\/12\/27\/cat-judging-you-on-how-little-time-you-spend-cleaning-privates\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Cat Judging You On How Little Time You Spend Cleaning Privates - The Philadelphia Satirer\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"PHILADELPHIA– The majority of humans often wonder what their pets are thinking, but with a breakthrough technology developed at the University of Pennsylvania we don\u2019t…\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/thephiladelphiasatirer.com\/2020\/12\/27\/cat-judging-you-on-how-little-time-you-spend-cleaning-privates\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"The Philadelphia Satirer\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:publisher\" content=\"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/philadelphiasatirer\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:author\" content=\"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/philadelphiasatirer\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2020-12-28T01:34:06+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:modified_time\" content=\"2020-12-28T01:34:08+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:image\" content=\"https:\/\/thephiladelphiasatirer.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/12\/erik-jan-leusink-IbPxGLgJiMI-unsplash-scaled.jpg\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:width\" content=\"2560\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:height\" content=\"1564\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:type\" content=\"image\/jpeg\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"Damien Wendy\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:creator\" content=\"@philasatirer\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:site\" content=\"@philasatirer\" \/>\n<script type=\"application\/ld+json\" class=\"yoast-schema-graph\">{\"@context\":\"https:\/\/schema.org\",\"@graph\":[{\"@type\":\"Article\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/thephiladelphiasatirer.com\/2020\/12\/27\/cat-judging-you-on-how-little-time-you-spend-cleaning-privates\/#article\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/thephiladelphiasatirer.com\/2020\/12\/27\/cat-judging-you-on-how-little-time-you-spend-cleaning-privates\/\"},\"author\":{\"name\":\"Damien Wendy\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/thephiladelphiasatirer.com\/#\/schema\/person\/955bf65a6b67e9a3f634f3bf9e5c4fb9\"},\"headline\":\"Cat Judging You On How Little Time You Spend Cleaning Privates\",\"datePublished\":\"2020-12-28T01:34:06+00:00\",\"dateModified\":\"2020-12-28T01:34:08+00:00\",\"mainEntityOfPage\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/thephiladelphiasatirer.com\/2020\/12\/27\/cat-judging-you-on-how-little-time-you-spend-cleaning-privates\/\"},\"wordCount\":191,\"publisher\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/thephiladelphiasatirer.com\/#organization\"},\"keywords\":[\"Cat\",\"Cleaning\",\"Judging\",\"Privates\"],\"articleSection\":[\"Local\",\"Nature\"],\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\"},{\"@type\":\"WebPage\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/thephiladelphiasatirer.com\/2020\/12\/27\/cat-judging-you-on-how-little-time-you-spend-cleaning-privates\/\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/thephiladelphiasatirer.com\/2020\/12\/27\/cat-judging-you-on-how-little-time-you-spend-cleaning-privates\/\",\"name\":\"Cat Judging You On How Little Time You Spend Cleaning Privates - 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