PHILADELPHIA – Scientists working with the Philadelphia Streets Department reported Tuesday that the barf levels outside of Citizens Bank Park have dropped by nearly 40% during the City\u2019s shelter in place order. \u201cAn average Phillies game brings out around 27,000 fans who produce 934 gallons of barf. I can see the number dropping a little without all those folks slamming beers, pounding hotdogs, and sucking down Dippin\u2019 Dots. However, there is a drive-through Coronavirus testing site in the parking lot which I\u2019ve seen people tailgating for so I would think that would help keep our barf numbers up in a healthy range, but they just aren\u2019t where we need them to be right now,\u201d said scientist Walter Gregory. The economic impact of the lack of barf will not be known for some time. Gregory speculated that jobs could be lost and the varmints\/vermin who rely on the barf to feed their families could go hungry. Gregory and a team of scientists are working around the clock with the mayor\u2019s office to come up with a barf stimulus plan for the grounds around Citizens Bank Park. At press time, the Streets Department was considering importing barf from the sidewalks around Pat\u2019s and Geno\u2019s to help maintain the delicate balance of the Citizens Bank Park sidewalk ecosystem.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Scientists working with the Philadelphia Streets Department reported Tuesday that the barf levels outside of Citizens Bank Park have dropped by nearly 40% during the City\u2019s shelter in place order.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":4,"featured_media":217,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[11,9,3],"tags":[16,18,19,17],"yoast_head":"\n