• They’re talking about their friends from middle school more.
• Even you are tired of seeing your baby photos.
• They only wish you happy birthday through Facebook.
• They’ve been seen using Facebook alone in their car at 2 a.m. in a McDonald’s parking lot.
• Their eyes are red after getting their fix.
• Ben Shapiro commented on their latest post with “too far.”
• They’re hacking an election.
• They’re on Facebook.

Staff

For when all of us write something or we’re too cowardly to put a name on an article. Hey, we’d like to be employed by whatever soulless corporation did a Google search to make sure we’re not a moron! Now you won’t know which one of us is the moron and you have to hire whoever applied!

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